How have we become so careless, or let me correct myself: reckless? Yes, reckless.
As I’m writing this, women all over the world are probably being talked about behind their backs, called a bitch by their “friends”, ridiculed for how they look, and just generally judged. And ladies, this time men are not the culprits; it’s us.
Yep, I said it, us. You, me, your best friend you grew up with since 5th grade, your college roommates, and dare I say it, your sorority sisters (don’t even get me started on the sorority topic… that’s a whole other ballgame people).
There seems to be this movement of the “cool girl” (again, could have an entire post on this but I digress… for now). The girl who doesn’t care, the girl who can act like and hang with the guys, the girl who has no feelings and is generally unaffected by actions that typically impact a properly functioning human being. This facade began when girls wanted to play games like guys do and be able to treat guys like guys treat women, but ladies, it’s backfiring– time to open your eyes.
Not only are women treating guys carelessly, these interactions have now transferred to what is in my opinion one of the most important relationships a girl has; her friendships, her sisterhoods.
When a man calls a girl a bitch or any other demeaning or derogative term, we are, rightly so, upset by it. We take it to heart, because regardless of the old “sticks and stones” saying, words DO hurt and they ARE impactful.
So knowing this, why has it suddenly become okay for women to treat other women that way? Here’s a hint: it’s not. In a time when we are so outwardly concerned and passionate about advancing respect for women in this world, it is downright shocking to see us bullying and degrading each other.
Working on a college campus, I see it more with every passing day. I overhear the conversations in Starbucks, I see the dirty glares passed out on the sidewalks, I see the clicks congregate, and I hear the agony and hurt from women experiencing first hand– it’s the time of the mean girl, but it doesn’t have to be.
We forget that we’re all human. We forget that we have similar experiences. We forget that fairness, kindness, and uprightness are not attributes to mock, but rather are attributes to strive to maintain.
We all preach “positive vibes” and “good vibes only”, but where is the action to back that up? Where is our integrity? Why are we not empowering each other?
Let me say it plainly: It’s not cool to be a mean girl, it’s not cool to tear each other down, it’s not cool to treat each other with a lack of respect, it’s not cool to be reckless with people, especially our friends.
At risk of sounding like a mom (although I often feel that way with my current job), if you don’t have anything nice to say, don’t say anything at all.
If you don’t have anything nice to say, be kinder. Be better.
It’s time for the era of the mean girl to end.
Here’s your call to action ladies: let’s start a revolution and dethrone the cool girl, because real queen’s fix each other’s crowns.
I’d love to hear your thoughts on this! How can we empower the women around us to stop the mistreatment toward each other?